Many years ago a woman I was helping said to me “I don’t think you understand what it’s like to run a business with kids.”
I could tell she was frustrated she wasn’t further along with the homework I had set her, but she was right – how could I?
It’s like walking somebody up to the base of a mountain you have never climbed, and even though they describe every step – they could never explain to you what the air really feels like on top, or the exhilaration when you see the view.
This was a pic I took whilst on a sales call for a client last year, it was a Saturday … doors were closing, this lady was one of the last to apply.
I surely have had my ass handed to me raising triplets and a 3yo over the past year, but I’ve also had some of my most rewarding financial results and fulfilling heart soaring moments too.
Even though it was the weekend and I had no help babysitting, I was motivated to see if I could help her.
So I swotted away mosquitos, patted bottoms and juggled dummies whilst my son jumped up and around his siblings. With some snacks, a lot of silent facial expressions, and the occasional “excuse me, just a second” we all had a good time.
She got some clarity around what was slowing her business down, and I shared a vision of what could be possible if she joined us.
Even though I didn’t close the sale, (timing was off) I didn’t go to ‘all this bother for nothing”.
I was committed to the cause enough that I was willing to to sacrifice some presence with my darlings… and expend a bit more energy than usual to get focused.
So now that I understand what it’s like to run a business and have kids….here is what I would have told that lady she needed.
Women and mothers are WAY too hard on themselves (myself included). You can’t do it all by yourself. Enlist the help of others, think laterally how you can make things more streamlined.
You do this by lowering your expectations, stretching out more realistic timelines and expanding your concept of what counts as success (somedays winning is just a shower and a luke warm coffee!).
2. Commitment to your Vision
Is it that you don’t like sales, or can’t sell yourself – or are you just a little bit in your head around the value you offer to others?
Getting help to fix the latter will revolutionise how you see the former.
3. Honouring your SELF
I love my kids, I also love having deep meaningful conversations with people who are passionate about what they do and on the precipice of doing something GREAT.
I honour myself by putting myself in a position I can include these conversations in my life. I don’t have to choose between being a mum or giving up my identity – I can be a multi-faceted woman who enjoys the best of what life has to offer.
4. Connection to your Source.
Your gut instinct will tell you when you’re off track, out of alignment with who you really are … or out of integrity with what you’re selling.
This will save you so many hours of busyness and help you find the short cut, and manifest results greater than you expected.
5. Faith, Patience and Trust that everything works out for the highest good for all involved.
Set your intention, vision your outcome, then let it go with the deep inner knowing that if you just keep putting one foot in front of the other you are magnetising your greatest dreams towards you.
That’s why I love sales … I don’t know how the conversation I have with somebody will revolutionise their journey – that’s why it’s not about whether they buy or not.
It’s also not a reflection on whether I’m rejected or a failure.
But also, it’s why I don’t have time or the effort or inclination to manufacture faux interest or manipulate people who aren’t ready to have a buying conversation.
As it turned out, this lady remembered our heartfelt conversation and enrolled 3 months later. She is now grateful to be in a community that is helping her business and customers thrive.
Don’t turn your business into an insecure teenager, hooked into the emotional roller coaster that comes with conditional self love and external validation.
When you have something genuinely awesome to sell, you don’t need to force it.
And when you are truly awesome at what you do – you also deserve to enjoy your life at a pace that feels good.
Thanks for the sales queen + extreme parenting convos this morning Kat Abianac
After suffering a fairly serious breakdown I was unable to cope with life in general. My body felt broke, old and frail – I didn’t just feel middle aged, I felt half dead. I hadn’t realised that my body was self destructing and I was doing it to myself, working long hours, too much alcohol, lots of bad food and absolutely no exercise.
After six months of working with Bianca, I no longer need my blood pressure medication, anti depressants and my cholesterol is in a safe zone. I have lost 2 dress sizes and more than 26 kilos. I now have a life outside of our business and can see a happy, healthy future for our family. I hope the person I became never comes back as I like this girl so much better.
I had heard of Bianca through some magazines – it was an investment but I had tried and failed so many times but in six short months, 20 kilos melted off me and it had a massive and unexpected effect on our styling business. While working with Bianca we secured a national gig, increased our prices to a level we previously thought no one would pay, AND we were booked out weeks in advance.
The majority of this 20 kilo weight loss has only been 5% diet and exercise, the rest has been an emotional journey. Bianca confronted me and called me on my BS and challenged some of my most deeply help beliefs about who I am. And the results are undeniable. I haven’t completely quit drinking, I still get to eat chocolate, I’ve had the best year in my business EVER – and perhaps the most important thing is how differently I react to things emotionally.
Who knew that taking it slowly and being kind to yourself could get you the results that yelling at yourself couldn’t.
Before working with Bianca I was super stressed and I thought it was too hard and I didn’t have the time to be slim AND successful. But I was surprised at how easy it was to implement Bianca’s system – I haven’t counted calories and I still pig out on foods I love. It’s been no coincidence to me that as a result of the new clarity of mind I’ve actually doubled my business at the same time I’ve made these changes to my body.