|#Fact 1 I love food. Did I mention that already?|
#Fact 2 I had ZERO will power left. I had completely exhausted my reserves of discipline after a 6 month diet which included 24 egg whites a day and almost 20 hours of cardio a week. I had totally rebounded and was fatter than I was before I started.
#Fact 3 My first memory of being critical of my body was as early as 5 years old. From 14 years on, I spent at least 10 years on the diet-binge-diet cycle trying to hate and punish myself skinny (and it never really worked).
Fact #4 Healthy eating and exercise is now just an effortless choice and as a result my body maintains a healthy weight (and I think I have a rockin body no matter what it looks like)
At the beginning of this e-book, I shared how I was *this close* to getting up and walking out of a Gala event in tears because I was so disgusted at my appearance. Even though I was being recognised for my efforts at getting the community healthier, I felt like a big fat hypocrite…
But if I had left I would have missed out on the best night ever! It was the first time my Dad had been able to come to an awards night since my parents divorced 10 years earlier. Along with my sister and husband, we were all in stitches from laughing so hard and exhausted from dancing like crazy people.
Looking back I can see how important it was that I stayed that night. But tragically I can think of a thousand other times that I avoided social situations and missed out on precious moments with my family because I didn’t feel comfortable in my body.
I was ashamed of living in a Fat Suit that was hiding who I really was.
I was sick of constantly researching new diets and trying to find ways to motivate myself.
I was exhausted from beating myself up down because I’d failed yet again at another unsustainable diet.
But most of all, I was sick of disappointing my husband – of keeping myself shut off from him, recoiling from his touch or snapping at him when I felt bad about myself. Or just in general not being present with him and able to receive his love when it counted the most.
And then I discovered something.
A BIG something.
A necessary something that needs to happen in order for ANY woman to be happy in herself.
In that first mindset coaching session Kylie helped me uncover that the reason why I couldn’t stick to a diet was because ….
in my subconscious mind I had associated dieting with a long, desolate road to nowhere!
Dieting to me conjured up an image of a black and white Western movie, complete with “stand off” music and a tumbleweed blowing against a backdrop of bleak nothingness.
In contrast I imagined what it would take to achieve my ideal body to be like a Rollercoaster – exciting, exhilarating, exhausting and something magical and special that you would find at a theme park. Something that you build up in your mind as an event out there in the future, for you to experience for just a short moment one day, and then leave maybe never to return again, or at least for several years!
Subconsciously I DIDN’T believe I could sustain my healthy weight like it was just a normal everyday occurrence.
And I believed you could achieve your goals but only for a short period of time, and you had to go through a huge, dreary trip of lonely suffering and sacrifice to get there.
For a long time afterwards, I just let life carry me along. I started leaving work on time, I pursued other interests and started exercising again – but only gently and when I felt like it.
I enjoyed my Friday night pizza routine and savoured every mouthful of the rocky road ice-cream I fought so hard to quit in the past.
But I remember often being surprised at my reflection in glass doors, I would giggle to myself that the body I was wearing seemed bigger than what I expected to see.
And then people started asking if I had lost weight.
I wasn’t sure? I never checked anymore and the batteries in my scales were flat.
And then I noticed my pants getting looser.
Only a little bit at first.
But over time…. it was a lot.
And the less I forced and the more I listened – the better and better my pants seemed to fit.
And other things in my life started to become more and more successful!
(But I’ll tell you more about THAT later.)
It wasn’t 5:2 Intermittent Fasting or Ketosis (I just didn’t have the discipline or will power anymore!)
It wasn’t pills (gave me the worst headaches and made me think I was psycho)
It wasn’t 1200 Calorie meal plans (omg starving & the sugar cravings were mental!)
Here’s what I did:
I gave up.
I gave up trying to lose weight and constantly figuring out what foods I should and shouldn’t eat.
Instead I started to focus on WHY I ate the way I did and WHY my body felt the need to protect itself with this extra surplus of stored fat.
By treating the excess weight, low energy, irritable mood and sugar cravings as just SYMPTOMS of an underlying cause, I stopped being so goddamn judgemental of myself.
And as time went by I even stopped seeing myself as a failure.
That was the really the thing that changed it all for me – it blew my mind how much I just naturally gravitated towards healthy foods when I believed my success was inevitable.
It’s almost 10 years on now from when Kylie and I first met – since then she’s been my mindset coach (still is), she’s certified me as a NLP practitioner (neuro-linguistic-programming) and now she’s my best friend and Godmother to my son.
We spent 2 years co-creating material together before venturing off on our own projects again, including the All or Nothing Antidote: “Lifestyle Weightloss” a term we coined when more and more ladies sent us messages like this:
Hey! I’m super busy so have been a bit slow implementing the program.
But one of my wins so far is I’ve lost 5kg!
Whoop Whoop! I don’t know how? Lol.
I eat treats everyday!
Hey B! Life is going great, just went on holidays with the kids and I’ve got a new job that I’m loving. Oh and by the way I’ve lost 10kg since we last spoke!
I’ve lost 1kg since we started, and I still ate cake 5 times this week. How is this even possible?
This is what happens when you focus on progress not perfection – when you remove the inner mindset obstacles to healthy eating and exercise so that it becomes just an easy and effortless and natural thing that you do.
So as a result of living your best life – the weight just seems to melt off.
Kylie and are both a testament to this process with our own personal journey, but it’s not just been limited to us – we’ve helped hundreds of women repeat this approach time and time again.
Now I have to be 100% honest with you – I didn’t have just one NLP coaching session and suddenly I was magically hypnotised to be healthy all the time.
In the meantime, get in our Facebook group!
Remember – Diets are for Dying – Life is for Living!
After suffering a fairly serious breakdown I was unable to cope with life in general. My body felt broke, old and frail – I didn’t just feel middle aged, I felt half dead. I hadn’t realised that my body was self destructing and I was doing it to myself, working long hours, too much alcohol, lots of bad food and absolutely no exercise.
After six months of working with Bianca, I no longer need my blood pressure medication, anti depressants and my cholesterol is in a safe zone. I have lost 2 dress sizes and more than 26 kilos. I now have a life outside of our business and can see a happy, healthy future for our family. I hope the person I became never comes back as I like this girl so much better.
I had heard of Bianca through some magazines – it was an investment but I had tried and failed so many times but in six short months, 20 kilos melted off me and it had a massive and unexpected effect on our styling business. While working with Bianca we secured a national gig, increased our prices to a level we previously thought no one would pay, AND we were booked out weeks in advance.
The majority of this 20 kilo weight loss has only been 5% diet and exercise, the rest has been an emotional journey. Bianca confronted me and called me on my BS and challenged some of my most deeply help beliefs about who I am. And the results are undeniable. I haven’t completely quit drinking, I still get to eat chocolate, I’ve had the best year in my business EVER – and perhaps the most important thing is how differently I react to things emotionally.
Who knew that taking it slowly and being kind to yourself could get you the results that yelling at yourself couldn’t.
Before working with Bianca I was super stressed and I thought it was too hard and I didn’t have the time to be slim AND successful. But I was surprised at how easy it was to implement Bianca’s system – I haven’t counted calories and I still pig out on foods I love. It’s been no coincidence to me that as a result of the new clarity of mind I’ve actually doubled my business at the same time I’ve made these changes to my body.